Yorkshire Wedding Photographer, Harrogate

It was one of “those” days.  Not for us but for our beautiful bride at Saturdays wedding.  I’m not going to post any pictures with this post because I don’t think it’s appropriate under the circumstances but I do want to write about what happened.  Because “these” things do sometimes you know.  Happen that is.  Not very often but sometimes.  When they do it’s sometimes difficult to carry on.  Our bride this week was an inspiration of love shining through against all the odds.

We arrived at the venue at the agreed time.   We met our groom at the door.  He was a little stressed and explained that one of the ushers had to make a dash back to his house because the wrong box had been picked up when they left home and so they only had half the place cards.  He was worried that the usher would get caught up in traffic and wouldn’t be back in time.  We reassured him that wouldn’t happen – there was plenty of time before the ceremony.

So we kicked off by taking some photos of the groom with “the boys”.  Andy was well on form and at his most creative – they were soon all pretty relaxed and having great fun being photographed.  Then the grooms parents arrived and I left Andy with them and the groom as I went to search for our bride.

I was not prepared for what I found.  Our beautiful, bubbly, well organised lovely bride was unhappy.  Very unhappy.  It was written all over her face – she looked like she had been crying for ages and really struggled to manage a smile for me.  She explained that “everything” was going wrong.  The place cards and one or two other aspects of her wedding arrangments it seems had not gone to plan.

Two bridesmaids were helping the bride to get ready but the atmosphere was solemn.  They were doing their best to be cheerful and champagne was order of the day but something else was going on.  Then I noticed a third bridesmaid dress hanging on the rail next to the wedding dress.  It was untouched.  I was astounded to be told that the third bridesmaid had sent a text message to the bride that morning stating she no longer wanted to be a bridesmaid and wouldn’t be attending the wedding.  Please forgive me for being outspoken here but in my book – regardless of the situation giving rise to this – of which I have no knowledge – this is unforgivable.

Brides usually choose their bridesmaids with care.  It’s an important job and one which should not be underestimated.  Only the closest of friends and relatives are usually asked to fulfil such a role.  The bride trusts in these people to assist her, share in her day and the run up to it and to provide emotional, practical and physical support when needed.  Most brides and bridesmaids share a really close relationship – it’s lovely to see – so to be informed by something as impersonal as a text message on the morning of the wedding that this lady was not going to show just beggars belief.  Devastating for our beautiful bride.  unforgivable for those close to her who share her righteous anger.

Naturally our bride was upset – who wouldn’t be?  I was unaware of the full extent of what had gone on but I knew that when they booked us our couple had put a trust in us that in some small way we would make a difference to their wedding day.  None of us knew at that time how much this would be needed on the day but now more than ever our bride needed something to smile about and friendly faces/people around her.

I took her aside.  I told her that her venue looked amazing (it did), her groom was really handsome and so looking forward to marrying her.  He had the best tie we had seen on a groom for a long time!  This made her smile – she had chosen it with him.  I didn’t know that when I told her it was the best though – it was lovely and matched perfectly with the wedding theme.  He was very emotional about her that morning and so happy (he was), her dress was beautiful and we had the best weather that we had seen all week.  The sun was shining and it was shining for her, on her wedding day.  Her flowers were just stunning.  Her bouquet really was a miniature work of art.  Someone had put such care into making that bouquet.  No matter what had gone wrong and how upset she may feel right now she looked beautiful and we were all of us going to have a fantastic day.  The most important thing of all and what she must not lose sight of was that the day was about two people who were very much in love.  It was their day.  No matter what was going on around them nothing and no-one could alter the fact that there was so much love between her and her husband to be.  It just shone out of them and she must not lose sight of that.

She welled up again – so full of emotion – and said she would like to wait for her mum to arrive to help her into the dress.  So I left her for a few minutes in the very capable hands of her bridesmaids and went of to find mum.  As I was waiting for mum to arrive at the venue I noticed a great group of people walking up the driveway.  They were the wedding guests!  A vintage coach had been booked to transport them from a nearby town centre to the venue but it had taken the wrong entrance and had dropped all the guests – including two elderly guests walking with sticks and several young mums with children in pushchairs walking up the driveway!  It made for some different pictures for us but not good for the guests!

Mum arrived and I quickly escorted her up to the brides room.  We had only a few minutes to spare before the ceremony time!  Sometimes mums get the “sharp end” of the bridal nerves on wedding mornings and most understand this and that things are often said in the heat of the moment that are not meant in quite the way they come out – it’s literally the fact that you take things out on those who you are closest to at times of stress.  Sometimes – often in fact – no-one else but mum will do when emotions are running high on the wedding morning.  This was one such occasion.  The look of sheer relief on our brides face as her mum walked through the door I will not forget for a long time.  They hugged and it was a moment where she knew that she had the strength to carry on and marry her guy – despite the adversity she was facing.

I can honestly say I’ve never seen a mum help a bride into a dress so quickly before.  She was amazing!  I got some fab shots of the emotion between them and mum in the centre of things doing the dress up.  Once the dress was on a last kiss and a hug from mum and then I left Andy with the bride, her dad and bridesmaids whilst the registrar talked to the bride and I escorted her mum down to her place in the ceremony area.

The groom and best man waited nervously.  The string quartet played fantastically and the fire crackled in the grate behind me as we all waited for the bride.  Suddenly, the music changed and I saw the bridesmaids start to make their way along the balcony to the stairs to make their descent into the ceremony area.  The bride, looking just amazing walking a few steps behind them on her father’s arm.  These last few steps as father and daughter before she gets married are always special and this was no different.  Her father’s hand gently placed over hers on his arm as if to reassure her that all was ok spoke volumes of the love between them.  The bride in her turmoil may not even have noticed it at the time but I did.  It’s those little touches which show a close relationship.

As she started the descent on the stairs the groom, unable to help himself turned to look towards her.  I was unable to get a shot of his expression because he had turned over the shoulder furthest away from me but I know from his whole body language that he was emotional.  The scene unfolding before me was magical.  The two bridesmaids could not stop smiling.  Following them the bride, veil over her face, walked gracefully towards her groom, her arm linked reassuringly through her dads – his hand still in place over hers.  As she came closer our groom turned and looked directly at me and then over his other shoulder.  I took my shot – the tears were streaming down his face.  He was simply overcome with the joy of the sight of his lovely bride making her way towards him.  To him they were alone in a crowded room – there only was her in his sight.  She paused for a moment at the end of the aisle, a bridesmaid stepped forward, took her bouquet and passed it back to the other bridesmaid then gently she lifted the veil and put it back, smiling reassuringly at the bride.  All the while dad did not let go of his daughter – prolonging the moment to the very last-minute.

The bride and grooms eyes locked onto each other.  Simultaneously they smiled.  There was no doubt that these two were doing the right thing in getting married – the love between them was almost palpable.  For that moment and the next 20 minutes all the stresses and traumas of earlier in the day were gone.  There were only two people in this great hall and they were so devoted to each other that no matter what else was going on nothing was going to spoil these moments as they promised their lives to one another.

Following the signing of the register we went to take some photographs of the couple alone.  They celebrated with champagne and were very relaxed although you could still sense that something wasn’t quite right overall.  When we came to move on to the formal group pictures involving the family it transpired that there had been the previous night an argument within the family and all was not well.  It is such a shame when such things spill over onto a wedding day.  This is a once in a lifetime day which cannot be repeated.  There is no room for politics on the day – only love, friendship and respect.  We documented the formal group photographs.  When the group as a whole were together everyone seemed happy and during the throwing of the confetti laughter was all around us but when the wedding party was broken down into smaller groups it was clear that there were undercurrents.  Such a shame.

Before the wedding breakfast had finished and the speeches began two guests had taken their leave.  The change in atmosphere was striking as other guests began to chill out, relax and enjoy the day as it was meant to be enjoyed.

The speeches began and the father of the bride took to his feet.  He knew that this had been in many ways a difficult day for his daughter and it shouldn’t have been.  He was very, very emotional as was the bride and groom listening to the speech.  Very few eyes in the ballroom were dry by the time he had finished speaking.  He did his daughter proud.  Next the groom stood up and took his turn.  Again his speech was filled with emotion as he spoke of his love for his beautiful wife, what she meant to him and how his life had changed since they met.  Unafraid to show his emotion he wore his heart on his sleeve and cried a lot as he poured out the strong feelings of love for his wife and we could tell he was very protective of her.  It was lovely to see and hear.  The pictures we shot of him during this time just say it all.  He is so full of expression in his face and his body language.

In keeping with protocol, the best man followed the grooms speech.  It was another speech from the heart and spoke of the change in his friend since he met his wife and how happy they both were and well matched.  Again it was a lovely speech to hear – full of humour and emotion.  I captured lots of pictures of guests laughing at his humour as he told funny little stories about the groom.  His brother like affection for the groom and protectiveness of the groom and his new wife were evident for all to see.  His friendship was the sort that lasts a lifetime.

As the wedding breakfast ended, darkness began to fall over the venue and we moved on into the evening celebrations we went once more to take some arty photographs with the bride and groom – this time using creative lighting in the balcony main hall.  They were so much more relaxed and more “them”.  This was how their wedding day should have been from start to finish – all about the two of them, clearly very much in love.

Following the wedding art shoot we went into the first dance – which was just beautiful to see and photograph as the couple had clearly been practising!  A little while later we all went outside where sparklers were lit.  I watched and photographed as the bride and groom tried to make a heart shape together with the dancing sparks in the dark.  Eventually, with persistance they managed it.  I thought how similar that was to the way their day had run – it started off with each of them doing their own thing a little down and not complete without the other but as soon as they merged together everything spelled out love and the love they had between them shone out for all to see – just like the sparkly love heart they had drawn at the end of the day.

It wasn’t by any means a perfect day but it was their day and their love had carried them through to a perfect ending – they were together and very much in love.  That moment was a perfect moment – I am so glad we captured it for them.  It’s moments like that – when it all comes together that help to make our job so worthwhile and enjoyable.